Decision and Deception (Invite Only)

[Lady Elestirne]

Several hours later they reached the kyuden. Elestirne said not a word as they rode in and dismounted, and was still silent after she had untacked Olore and the two of them had gone to her room. She allowed a servant in briefly to wash and re-wrap her wounds-and properly splint her ribs and hand, then shooed them out, her silver eyes bleak. Taking some healing salve that had been left in her room, she smeared it on the demon-tainted injuries-especially the gash on her ribs. When she was done and had washed, she changed out of the rags into a simple gown of silver and white-her swords around her slender waist-then left the room and followed Storm soundlessly as he exited his own room ahead of her. He did not look behind him, so she knew he was unware of her. She remained unobtrusively by the door though, as he continued to the room’s center to address the gathered lords, and their eyes focused on him and him alone; not noticing the gaunt, pale and bandaged elf that stood just past the threshold watching quietly.

Before her voice was drowned out in the heated arguments that resulted at his announcement, she spoke; her voice ringing clearly, though pained. “What he tells you is true. And Telemachus met his end by my blades. I cannot tell you the tale of Tatsumura’s end either,only that he chose his path. And that your loss is my fault. If there is blame to be laid, level it on me, for Tatsumura would not have left the kyuden had Storm not asked him to do so to help recover me. And he would not have died if he had not had to fight Telamon as a distraction to allow my escape. So it is my fault and level what punishment you will on me, not Storm, for I only am responsible. Not him.” As the debate broke out again, she did not stay to listen, but went back to her room and sat long in meditation with her head bowed.

Much later, she left and-barefoot and seeming half in a trance-glided ghostlike into the gardens, wandering soundlessly before stopping in a patch of moonlight and sinking painfully to her knees. She bowed her head as the raw bitterness, guilt and grief rose up; assaulting her empathic senses. Slowly, ritually, she slipped her shattered hand out of the sling and raised both arms heavenwards. Closing her eyes, she raised her face upwards as well; bathing her features and form in moonlight. With a faint shudder, she focused her mind on the fallen as a short, soft song rose to her lips.

‘Forgive the friend who could not stand at your side
Forgive the ally who could not lend their strength in time
The battle was yours only to fight, the path yours only to walk
May your gods receive you kindly and with honor
Journey onwards knowing your foe is ended
Journey onwards knowing you will be remembered’

Silently, she added. And I am sorry it is because of me that you do so. Opening her eyes, she lowered her arms back to her sides and replaced her hand in its sling. Regret and shame rose up as she turned her thoughts to Telamon. Regret for what he had been…shame for what she had done. No matter that it had been justified, nor that she had been forced to it-it was still an abhorrent act. Regardless of what path he ultimately chose he was an elf. Once. Now his blood stains my hands as surely as Aegruth’s does. And Tatsumura’s as well.

Elestirne bowed her head, her slender frame sagging with sudden weariness as she felt again the full weight of grief, loss, and years that lay in her future. Her silver eyes took on a bleak, haunted cast as she thought on the curse and what lay in store. This is only the beginning…the first loss of many. How many more times shall I endure this? And how many of those losses shall be my fault? A few tears glinted,diamond bright.

Gradually, she became aware of a silver glow blossoming all around her. She thought it Olore but, as she lifted her head minimally, she was astonished to see instead a tall silver-gowned elven female with silver hair and eyes. A radiance surround the mysterious woman, shimmering around her like sparkling silver rain and pooling at her feet. The power and magic in the air were palpable. Wondering,Elestirne noted that she herself shone with a sparkling silver-blue luminence,and that her swords were glowing softly in their sheathes. Speechless and awestruc, the elf bowed her head in reverence as the realization of her celestial visitor's identity became clear to her.

Daughter from daughter descended, do not shoulder guilt and blame where none exists, Holy Araira, the Stargiver's tone was softly chiding, almost motherly. No blood of either friend or foe stains your hands. They chose their own paths and you are blameless. The chiming voice now took on a tone of stern rebuke, but remained gentle. You should embrace what you are, my radiant Elestirne-not hide from or fear it. You will find no peace if you continue to deny the part of your lineage you keep secret. It is a part of you and you cannot change it.

The goddess of heavens and prophecy,queen of the night,took the elf by her shoulders and raised her to her feet. You mustn't deny or hide fom it,or you will bring more grief to yourself than what already lies in store. Tell your companions what you are and the curse you are under-and do not fear their reactions. If they are true friends, the revelations shall not alter their friendship-especially not Storm's. T'elei has not turned from you in all this time for knowing. Nor shall Storm or Tsukasa. Reveal what you are Alatael Elestirne, if they ask, and embrace it my radiant chosen-for only then shall you accept and be at peace with yourself.

With that,the elven goddess touched her forehead lightly-in the very center,just above the moonstone in her crown-then just simply faded away with a shimmer of moonlight and twinkle of stars. A breath of starwind teased a tendril of hair across Elestirne's face, but the elf stood as though frozen;bathed and crowned by silver moonlight. After a long moment she crumpled to her knees, head bowed;a silver-blue shimmer still limning her form. The place where the goddess had touched her seemed to shimmer silver beneath the moonstone.

[Tsukasa]

Tsukasa sat outside of the kyuden pondering what to do next. He has yet found a place for himself. Even though he did not know the one called Tatsumura all that well, he said a quick prayer to the fortunes that his soul would find peace and be allowed to join his ancestors. He continue to enjoy the cool air of the autumn breeze,

After a few hours he decided to search for Lady Elestirne.

[Lady Elestirne]

Elestirne raised her head minimally. The awe and wonder of Araira's visit-and sense of the star-goddess's presence itself-had faded. But her words had not, and they chilled the elf as surely as frost chills a leaf. And Araira had used her true-name, binding her tighter than any chains. If she was asked, she would have to tell. No, more than that. She would be compelled to. Elestirne sighed. They were mortals-they were bound to ask. Curiousity would drive them if nothing else. Over a decade of experience with mortals had taught her that much. And if they asked, she would have to tell. But what would they think of her? Despite Araira's assurances, Elestirne remained worried. But she was more worried for if the council would decide to blame and punish her for Tatsumura's death. Almost she felt they should- she blamed herself after all, and would almost welcome punishment in lieu of the guilt she felt.

True, as Araira had said, it was not her fault-but that didn't prevent her from feeling as though it was, and as though she could have done something to prevent it. Survivor's guilt,she thought bitterly; suddenly identifying with how Nichtmar must have felt after the failed attack on Ravenswood. I could have done nothing, even if I had been free,she admitted with great reluctance. Tatsumura's path was his own to choose and I could not have swayed him from it. No one could have. But at least I slew Telamon in payment for his fall.

The thought made her flinch and she bowed her head once more; closing her eyes with a shudder. The demon-inflicted gash burned suddenly white-hot at the memory and beneath it her ribs throbbed fiercely, with equal pain. Gingerly, she pressed her right hand against the injuries. A few tears tickled down her cheek from the pain. Mittelmarch and many others would doubtless call me a hero for that deed, yet I feel only shame and regret. And failure. Tatsumura's blood may not be on my hands but Telamon's is. And it is still partially because of me that Tatsumura fell, regardless. Either way,I am at fault and have failed in some way.